Lord I believe, please help me through my doubts.

   I went to a funeral yesterday for an old friend, Virginia Downing. I met her when I first started teaching in Seward, she was in the final few years of her career and I was a first year teacher. She was an excellent teacher, and had the desire to help those who were starting out in their careers. Virginia was born in 1919, so she was older than Eleanor, she was healthy, but had Alzheimer's so her final years of life were not easy.
   At the funeral, the pastor used the story of the centurion who asked Jesus to heal his servant, Jesus asked if he believed in him, and his reply was yes, but. I was talking with Eleanor about the yes, buts in our lives and she told me that as she has grown older she is more certain about her relationship with God. She has a hard time reading and hearing, but she still tries to listen to the tapes from St. John every week and read the large print Portals of Prayer devotions. It is becoming increasingly difficult for her to get around, so corporate worship is not easy to attend. I'm glad the yes, buts are now only yeses for her.

Funnies

   I had coffee and mixed berry muffins with Eleanor this morning. I asked if I could take the Sunday newspaper to the recycling bag at Heartland. Eleanor wasn't sure that I should take the comics, as Sam or Austin might like to see them. The boys enjoy looking at and reading the comics when they stop to visit her.
   She remembered that as a child, her grandfather Nelson would save the newspapers in his workshop. When Eleanor would visit, she would go out to the workshop and read and color the comic strips. She always looked forward to going through the papers looking for comics. When they were ready to return to the farm, they always brought the saved newspapers with them, as they were used in the outhouse.
   I can remember visiting my grandparents farm in Minnesota and visiting the outhouse with its pile of newspapers and catalogs stacked between the two seats on the outhouse bench.